The Southern Lexicon 4.0: Holiday Edition

This Christmas, your in-laws from Hoochalassee, Alabama will be staying at your house for a few days.  It’s very important that you know what they are saying.

This should help.

1.  Kruh-smuss – Christmas

In The Southern Lexicon, this word not only refers to the holiday itself but also to the gifts and activities that come along with the holiday.

The Holiday: “Murry Kruh-smus, y’all!”

The Gifts That Come Along With The Holiday: “Dakota, come in here an’ open up yur Kruh-smus.”

The Activities That Come Along With The Holiday: “Where we gone do Kruh-smuss this year since Lonnie and Loretta lost they trailer?”

For any kid that gets a gift between November 26 and December 25, the entire holiday season is over.

“Dead-ee, thanks fur gettin’ me dat Taylor Swift poster.”

“Sho ’nuff, Dakota but that’s yur Kruh-smuss.”

2.  Munny – Money

“Them folks down the road ain’t got no munny.  Somebody needs to get them babies some Kruh-smuss.”

3.  Toe-d – Told

“Loretta, open up yo present.”

“Oh, it’s a framed picture of Dale Sr. and Elvis with angels wangs.  I love it!  But I thought I toe-d you not to get me no Kruh-smuss.”

4.  Blow-d – Blew (up)

“Lonnie, be careful fryin’ dat turkey.  Last year you purt near blow-d up da whole house.”

5.  Fit-n-ta – Fixing to; About to

“Loretta, I’m fit-n-ta blow-d you up if’n you don’t leave me alone!”

6.  May-sh-d – An option for the preparation of potatoes; what you do to your finger

The Preparation of Potatoes: “Mamma, them’s some good may-sh-d taters.”

What You Do To Your Finger: “One year Lonnie may-sh-d his fanger real good takin’ down Kruh-smuss lights so now we just keep ’em up year ’round.  It’s say-fer.”

Combo: “Lonnie!  Git yer naystee may-sh-d fanger out da may-sh-d taters!  Why can’t we do Kruh-smuss right?  Ever year it’s dis a way.”


The Southern Lexicon 4.0: Holiday Edition is sure to help this Christmas to be a little easier for you and yours.  Oh, and look on the bright side.  Next year, you get to go to Hoochalassee, Alabama.