This Christmas, your in-laws from Hoochalassee, Alabama will be staying at your house for a few days. It’s very important that you know what they are saying.
This should help.
1. Kruh-smuss – Christmas
In The Southern Lexicon, this word not only refers to the holiday itself but also to the gifts and activities that come along with the holiday.
The Holiday: “Murry Kruh-smus, y’all!”
The Gifts That Come Along With The Holiday: “Dakota, come in here an’ open up yur Kruh-smus.”
The Activities That Come Along With The Holiday: “Where we gone do Kruh-smuss this year since Lonnie and Loretta lost they trailer?”
For any kid that gets a gift between November 26 and December 25, the entire holiday season is over.
“Dead-ee, thanks fur gettin’ me dat Taylor Swift poster.”
“Sho ’nuff, Dakota but that’s yur Kruh-smuss.”
2. Munny – Money
“Them folks down the road ain’t got no munny. Somebody needs to get them babies some Kruh-smuss.”
3. Toe-d – Told
“Loretta, open up yo present.”
“Oh, it’s a framed picture of Dale Sr. and Elvis with angels wangs. I love it! But I thought I toe-d you not to get me no Kruh-smuss.”
4. Blow-d – Blew (up)
“Lonnie, be careful fryin’ dat turkey. Last year you purt near blow-d up da whole house.”
5. Fit-n-ta – Fixing to; About to
“Loretta, I’m fit-n-ta blow-d you up if’n you don’t leave me alone!”
6. May-sh-d – An option for the preparation of potatoes; what you do to your finger
The Preparation of Potatoes: “Mamma, them’s some good may-sh-d taters.”
What You Do To Your Finger: “One year Lonnie may-sh-d his fanger real good takin’ down Kruh-smuss lights so now we just keep ’em up year ’round. It’s say-fer.”
Combo: “Lonnie! Git yer naystee may-sh-d fanger out da may-sh-d taters! Why can’t we do Kruh-smuss right? Ever year it’s dis a way.”
The Southern Lexicon 4.0: Holiday Edition is sure to help this Christmas to be a little easier for you and yours. Oh, and look on the bright side. Next year, you get to go to Hoochalassee, Alabama.